Draymond Green is heralded as the “intensity” guy for the Golden State Warriors. He plays with a “chip” on his shoulder. He gets loud and obnoxious and wears his heart on his sleeve, etc. etc. He has been called the “emotional leader.”
This is the kind of guy that fans love on their team and opponents’ fans love to hate. Like most of modern and popular sports, we like to make caricatures of players. But, underneath the surface, what is going on with this guy? He is, of course, just a normal human being. When I read a recent article about him, I realized that we love to hold up the guys with great intensity and who “play angry.” But, has anyone asked, is this a healthy way to live?
It is a silly question to many people to question if being an NBA All-Star and making a lot of money is a lifestyle to be desired. I don’t really know Draymond Green, but I’ve read about enough high school, college, and pro athletes who seem to be just like him. I’ve been one myself. They are out to prove people wrong. They are ready to slam the naysayers and show they can achieve the impossible. The problem is this: we have been living our entire lives based on opinions of other people.
Let’s consider what it takes emotionally and spiritually to agree to the story of the overachiever. You get praise, personal glory, trophies, and sometimes money. However, you constantly live a life that is defined by others. You are defining yourself by the judgement of others and the performances of other athletes relative to your own. Think about it. This mindset has seemingly worked out for Draymond Green in the eyes of the world, but how many lesser talented Greens have tried and failed and bring this mentality to their home, workplace, and relationships? The emotional damage is overwhelming. This mentality leaves one without a true self. What if Green wanted to be a teacher or a chef, but the negative voices doubting his basketball abilities always won out?
What does a healthy person look like? St. Irenaeus said the glory of God is man fully alive. To me, to be alive starts with being awake and aware of the larger stories going on. The fact that God loves and cares deeply for us is extremely important. The fact that we are made in the image of God — for relationship with God, ourselves, others, and creation — is also incredibly important.
So, staring at the world below them, Jesus looks out and considers the devil’s supposed offer, “to inherit the whole world.” Later in Matthew 16, Jesus says, what good is it for a person to inherit everything but lose his soul? By living a life defined by others, athletes like Green walk dangerously close to giving away their soul. They risk not knowing who they are, how God has uniquely made them, or what they really offer their community and world around them.
As parents, coaches, and friends, how are we dealing with people who are out to prove people wrong? Do we help stoke the fire and enable their passionate beliefs, especially those with great talent? Or, do we try to press pause and express some concern that their soul will never be at rest? Do we point out to them about how we are loved and embraced by God well before we can achieve anything? Do we recognize the real thirst they have for acceptance and love? Do we recognize how much harm this poorly driven person can do to himself, his family, and others around him?
It is so prevalent in modern sports to praise the athlete who outworked everyone to achieve their goals. We salute the sacrifices of lonely morning workouts and extra practices that make the difference in crunch time. We worship these athletes who break records and go their own way to achieve greatness. My take on this is that we must be concerned. If life is about love, relationships, and God’s loving embrace, we inherently do not need to achieve personal greatness or glory. We do not need to pull ourselves up by our own bootstraps. If we let go of these false narratives, we can embrace family, friends, and even our enemies who doubt us.
How can a simple theology — that a good God created us and loves us — change some of these narratives? How can we take this understanding to others? We are meant to live with this free gift of being loved by God. This love is meant to feed us in order to be servants of each other. We are all meant to be embraced by God’s love and live out of that acceptance and affirmation. This kind of true life, being alive to God’s love, allows us to let go of unhealthy stories and constant comparisons. If we can’t accept ourselves, we can’t accept others. Let us submit to love instead of fighting for it and never finding it.
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Personal Reflection (Zac):
The role of the underdog resonates with me. I grew up being the smallest guy on the soccer field. When I was little, I had my left kidney removed and had to play soccer with a large pad. As a result, I was anxious on the field, but I was out to prove that I belonged and that I was good. I loved playing sports, but I also loved to know who all noticed me being good.
In high school, I fed on criticism and doubts like they were steroids. I put up famous quotes in my room and made up quotes of my own that would fuel my work ethic and drivenness. I would remember negative statements from opponents or other coaches. As I got ready to make the jump to college tennis, I had my own collection of coaches who weren’t interested and said they were looking for players ranked ahead of me.
As I made it to college, my best memories of playing athletics were still intertwined with the feeling that I could show the naysayers what I had accomplished through the scholarship I earned, the gear I had collected, and the Division I powerhouses I was competing against. I had made it. I proved them wrong.
When tennis was taken away from me mid-college due to a back injury, I entered a long identity crisis. I found it much easier to live in the story of proving people wrong. Now that I no longer had tennis, I had to find other stories to live in. My faith started growing from what felt like a real life bad dream. I feared that I was a nobody and worth nothing without sports. It was a scary journey. However fearful I was in the loneliness, I was still scared to read and hear that God loved me for who I was. I didn’t have to earn or prove anything to receive his love. This kind of story did not jive with my past ones. I always wanted to earn things. To be a real person and receive love for free was an option I had not considered.